[1] In today’s age, we live busy lives, trying to strike a balance between work, school, hobbies, self-care and more. Worse still, we take this step with the false presupposition that our […], How many times did it happen to you to know something for sure and to believe that what you knew was the truth, […], I love Wayne Dyer! One hundred and fifty. The Genuine Human Connection: Authentic, Meaningful Conversations July 28, 2019 By Sarah McVanel Leave a Comment Imagine you are at a conference, and you don’t see the typical, perfectly presented people standing on the stage, sharing … You’re letting them know you care what they have to say. That’s why during our weekly meetings, we praise each other in front of the entire team. It’s important to be with the person you’re with. It’s astonishing when you realize that the Dalai Lama was exiled from his own land and is constantly under threat, but yet he still manages to be both wise and joyful at the same time. Here’s a tip: Get out of the weeds of weather and small talk. How often do you listen, like really, really listen? And don’t just ask the “nice, safe” questions. So here’s what works for me: Be open to random connections. Because they had the best resume? ( What that beautiful woman says to her husband at minute 3:15… I really feel you will LOVE that! Many people disagree with the policies of the first person on our list but almost everybody who has come into contact with him says he’s charming. “People want that connectivity that’s real” comments Mary, a Bottleshake app user. And it is my hope that by sharing this short video with you, where 6 pairs in different stages of their relationship are testing this theory of 4 minutes of uninterrupted eye contact, you will feel inspired to no longer pass people by. There are insights that you bring to the table because of your particular experiences and unique perspective. The conversations range from discussions of customer engagement, employee-employer relations, and good old-fashioned personal relationships. Sometimes your insights might be spot on, profound, helpful. And Dr. Matthew Lieberman of UCLA showed that social pain is interpreted by the brain the same as physical pain. The Human Connection in a Digital World. A true connection is hard to come by, partly because it’s not every day someone comes along that you immediately click with and partly because a real connection is often mistaken for something else entirely, whether it be the honeymoon phase of a relationship or just straight up sexual attraction. “What do you do?” doesn’t cut it. But if we can just simply practice this simple exercise… If we could just look into people’s eyes and see them for who they truly are, the quality of all our relationships will improve. A Whole9 guest post by Kate Galliett, creator of Fit for Real Life and The Unbreakable Body, an online strength and mobility program. When Sean dined with him, he observed some of the qualities that really made the founder of Virgin stand out. Real human connection comes first. It’s an exchange of emotion. Another powerful thing President Clinton did. And when you open yourself up to what they have to say, most likely they’ll be more open to whatever you have to say. The other reason we’re not able to connect with others is that, frankly, a lot of us carry some serious baggage that interferes with us caring about those we meet. Nobody wants a voice that sounds frantic and flustered. When Sean was working with President Bill Clinton, he noticed that even people with a vendetta against the man would leave with a smile on their face after a meeting. Stay mindful of whether you both have been able to talk about 50% of the time. The answer is, “A lot.” According to Sean. The eyes are the window to the Soul. As Sean spent time with some of the most charismatic and influential leaders in the world, he discovered 13 key strategies you can use to connect with just about everyone. Thankfully I have that in my significant other but human beings need human connection in all facets of life, everyone is depressed and mental illness is on the rise, while genuine human communication is on the decline. In order to connect, you have to share and ask for others to share. Celebrating someone else isn’t just a booster for them; it’s also a booster for you. Having genuine connections between team members can be integral to overcoming challenges and growing. These are the 3 rules to follow to avoid Recruiter Spam and establish a human connection: i) Be Personal The longest-running study in the world, the Harvard Study of Adult Development, has shown over the span of 80 years that a strong sense of community is the most significant factor in living a longer, happier life. That makes perfect sense. It’s one in which you and I come out from behind ourselves, into the conversation, and make it real. Every time I play the game with friends, I'm always thrown off by that card. So why is a strong sense of human connection, something so natural and vital, so difficult for us to create? When you’re talking with someone and your eyes are not on them but the person you consider “the most important person in the room,” you’re sending out the energy that you don’t care or value the person right in front of you. We all know that first impressions matter (science confirms this) so how do we make a good one? Get to know them by asking questions. Now that is a scary thought. Most people wouldn’t blame the President for saying that he needed to discuss important matters with someone else. This means you can a) get to know them better and b) know for certain that you didn’t unintentionally cut them off. A human connection is showing that you have an awareness that a … The customers at a restaurant might not even have noticed that their server touched them on the shoulder, but their body would have immediately reacted by increasing dopamine, serotonin, and oxytocin (the “happy brain” chemicals) and decreasing cortisol levels (the stress hormones). The reason, I believe, is that we all need to feel connected. Don’t worry, you don’t have to agree with their opinions, but asking for someone’s opinions shows that you think what they’ve got to say is valuable. No matter what role you fill in a team, … In fact, our drive for human connection is so powerful that multiple studies have shown that feeling lonely and isolated is more detrimental to our health than smoking or obesity. Connection is not an exchange of information. Each of the individuals above has a different story, but the one thing that they all had in common was that they wanted to connect with others and they cared about how they made others feel. Richard Branson might own his own island but he also knows the value of humility. People tend to treat conversation as if it’s a competitive sport, trying to one-up the other person, “win” the debate, or display what they know. And because we all have mirror neurons (the same neurons that cause you to yawn when you see another person yawn), other people will be much more likely to smile back at you. Genuine human connection can be so hard to find. I don't know who all are familiar, but "genuine human connection" is an actual white card in the game "Cards Against Humanity." Nonverbal cues matter. Of course you should! Wisdom is being in touch with your intuition, listening to yourself, being able to share valuable advice with someone regardless of whether they take it or not. Even though we might think that in order for us to connect with those around us in a very deep and profound way, and in order for us to create genuine human connections we have to invest a lot of time and energy into our relationships, studies have shown that just 4 minutes of uninterrupted eye contact is all that it takes to increase intimacy. In a study conducted by Dr. Cara Tigue and her colleagues, subjects were asked to vote for higher or lower-pitched versions of previous American Presidents. Richard Branson makes a point to ask the people he meets creative questions. Why do so many of us feel so lonely? There’s no real mystery to making a human connection with candidates. By smiling with his entire body. This is how the I.A.P. A voice that’s lower and smoother is more likely to convince us that the owner is calm and competent enough to be a leader. For example, I can count all of my close friends on one hand. All of that is okay. It reminds us that we’re all just human. People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. How to use connection in a sentence. And you allow yourself to also SEE the person sitting in front of you… In doing so, you open your heart to love. Sean met the Dalai Lama at an event where both of them were speakers. Six months ago, I wrote an article about the power of human connection and how technology helps us stay connected. You’ve probably answered that question a million and one times and so have they. People mingle, and talk to each other but don’t form connection. You might think, “Well, I’m not the Dalai Lama, so what wisdom could I possibly have to share?”. Now, that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t ever celebrate yourself. A genuine connection brings more than feelings. If you have a real connection with someone, your conversations will be easy and free flowing, not awkward. What a human connection looks like. Research shows us that loneliness is on the rise, and that a lack of human connection can be more harmful to your health than obesity, smoking and high blood pressure. By putting our thoughts on hold for the other person, we create more space for them to open up with us. When you make people feel seen, you end up having more engaging conversations and more opportunities to deeply connect. Richard Branson has a reputation for being successful, interesting, and eccentric — on top of being one of the most likable guys out there. And when we compete, we can’t connect. ), eval(ez_write_tag([[336,280],'purposefairy_com-box-4','ezslot_3',122,'0','0']));~love, Luminita. We carry our shyness, our cynicism, our competitiveness, and our pride with us. Open up to genuine human connection. It brings a lot of fun to the table, as you and your spouse won’t be afraid to show off your weirdest habits. I'm very lucky and blessed to say that those people are my support system and the people I value most in my life. So be real, but also put your best foot forward. This is something we take to heart at Mindvalley. However, today, finding great friendships or long lasting romantic relationships is rare. No, most likely it was because you felt they cared about you. And our lives will be forever changed. You may have noticed that connection occurs most often during moments of honesty and vulnerability. Use some of the other tips above, like hit pause and listen or ask creative questions, to generate dialogue with the person you’re talking to. How would that make you feel? With the many things we have to do on a regular basis and all the thoughts that run through our minds, it can be quite challenging to give the people in our lives all the attention, 15 Things You Should Give Up To Be Happy Book Page, Carl G. Jung Archetypes: The 4 Stages of Life. “Thoroughly unprepared, we take the step into the afternoon of life. Studies show that vocal traits, such as pitch, texture, and modulation, influence who people consider likable, dominant, and competent. For starters, some of us are confused about what connection actually means. by Cheyenne Diaz And where love is present, creating genuine human connections becomes effortless and natural. Luminita, the Founder of PurposeFairy, is an enthusiastic student of the arts, psychology, and spirituality. And, importantly, they will have some substance; sure, you both love to … By letting go of all your thoughts, worries, and concerns, you allow yourself to be seen. Brene Brown states clearly that we are "wired for connection" but what gets in the way is, in her opinion, our lack of vulnerability. It’s what we all crave for… ~ Luminita D. Saviuc. We’d probably assume that the Dalai Lama is wise — but did you know that he’s playful as well? That’s the neat thing about advice. Otherwise, we may not face a world in which machines replicate humanity, but where humanity replicates machines. That is communication, says world-renowned speaker Sean Stephenson in this episode of the Mindvalley Podcast with Vishen Lakhiani. Yes, technology is convenient. So share your trials and tribulations. It might sound silly to say “check your voice,” but your voice actually does affect other people’s perceptions of you quite a bit. Humans to Humans The Next Wave of Human Connectivity • Visit our website, learn more about our programs, or sign up for an information session below: linktr.ee/genuinehumanconnection We all want straightforward communication. More often than not, the other person will have more to say. It’s no surprise that human connection can have such a huge effect. This means that when you’re remembering someone’s name, you’re not remembering a word; you’re remembering them. “I define connection as the energy that exists between people when they feel seen, heard, and valued; when they can give and receive without judgment; and when they derive sustenance and strength from the relationship.” ~ Brené Brown. How to Create Genuine Human Connections. That’s because we’re all innately social creatures, hard-wired to seek out a community. Another study shows that the brain recognizes our names as part of our core identity. These are the 4 strategies President Clinton used to inspire a sense of camaraderie: Here’s a quick insight: Everybody wants to be known. Dunbar’s Number. Study after study reports that as social animals, humans need each other. Of course, that doesn’t mean complaining. Certainly human connectivity occurs one wonderfully fierce conversation at a time. As we said earlier, “conversation” doesn’t mean “monologue” or “one-man performance.” Both sides have to participate equally in answering questions, asking questions, and listening. How do you connect with people determined not to like you? It should be the goal of every recruiter. We’re serious here. But this relentless online digital connection is not at all real social intimacy, and leads us to a deep feeling of solitude. But it doesn’t have to be this way. How does he do this? This is exactly what Clinton does, and it works wonders. It’s easy to either dominate or disappear from the conversation. The Human Connection: Why It Matters. Because it’s not just about the lips; it’s about the eyes, too. But conversations aren’t one-man performances. How often do you pause and take the time to think about what the other person is trying to say instead of trying to think of something to say? Have you ever felt someone’s attention on another person as you were speaking to them? Sean suggests that listening doesn’t just happen when we stop speaking. Other times they might not be welcome. It’s an exchange of emotion. Listening takes place when you put your life on pause. Many people make this mistake in different ways: they try to create a connection with someone who doesn’t want it, or hope the person responds in a certain way, or want the other person to be something they’re not, and so on. I long for a genuine connection a person that I can bare my soul to that will do the same in return. By his teens, he had already broken 300 bones in his body due to a rare genetic disease called Brittle Bone disease. the power of human connections cannot be under-estimated…if counseling and therapy are the cure for mental issues then connecting and communicating and socializing(the real … A simple touch can convey the fact that you’re a warm person and increase their connection with you. Light physical contact at just the right moment actually increases tips for restaurant servers, persuades subjects to share personal information, inspires individuals to help look for lost objects, and encourages people to sign petitions. Neuroscientists have even named a phenomenon after the power of hearing our names spoken. Compounding matters is the added burden of increasingly busy schedules. This paper focuses on the intersection of technology and the challenges that contemporary students face in managing their anxiety and forming social connections. And I always play it in situations where others are going with crude humour, just to see if… As a multiethnic American, she grew up learning and loving other cultures. By his teens, he had already broken 300 bones in his body due to a rare genetic disease called Brittle Bone disease. Usually, people will be more than happy to hear how you’ve succeeded and they’ll offer you cheers of support. While I accept fewer invitations these days than I did a couple … That has the effect of inspiring a sense of human connection in almost everyone who sees you. The lower-pitched versions were chosen 69% of the time. But imagine if you had the leader of the free world leaning into you to hear your opinion on something that matters to you — and then he thanks you for sharing. Later on, it became the heart of her book, 15 Things You Should Give Up To Be Happy., book that was published by Penguin Random House. The Human Connection gemeinnützige GmbH was founded in 2012 and is recognized and registered as a non-profit organization at the register court Amtsgericht Stuttgart under the registration number HRB 741951 due to the promotion of international spirit, tolerance in all areas of culture and the idea of international understanding. Often considered one of the more humble entrepreneurs, Sean learned through his observations of Branson that there’s a distinct difference between confidence and humility. It’s this combination that really seems to have an effect on people. That’s quite the difference. It’s a relief when we see someone break out of the social media mold and be honest. And we all know what a fierce conversation is, right? Yes, it saves us time and money as we can connect across the globe without traveling. Embrace and recognize failure as a learning opportunity. Interesting! He made a promise early on to take up “the responsibility to connect with humanity” by trying to “meet people and get to know their lives.”. Our bodies react in the same way. While this strategy requires sensitivity and discretion, physical touch can be extremely effective for establishing a connection. So when you meet someone, ask for their name, repeat it back, remember it, and then use it in conversation. Lieberman cites more than 1,000 published and unpublished studies — he found our need for social connection is a survival instinct as important as food, water, and shelter. ... It’s a core, human need. The Value and Importance of Human Connections. by Dennis Reina. Remembering and using someone’s name is one of the smallest acts that speaks the loudest. And Sean, more than anyone, knows what it takes to connect with people. True connections take time to develop—and they do not have ample time. That’s why President Clinton gives whoever he’s talking to 100% of his focus. Many believe that only a lucky few are born with the ability to connect with anyone — but that’s actually not the case. Cheyenne Diaz is a Mindvalley Writer, who always gets creative inspiration when she takes hikes through her favorite place in the world, Big Sur, California. After all, there’s no tax or cost for praising another individual. Sean tells this transformational story in the podcast, but through it, he learned. Time to you is not time to everybody else. True connection isn’t what happens when your Bluetooth earbuds recognize your computer. These last lessons are inspired by Sean’s own experiences. That’s because we’ve all got opinions and wisdom to share, but it’s rare that someone gives us the opportunity to offer those fruits. The truth is that the most important person in the room is the one right in front of you. Could I brag to you about it?”. 5 Reasons Why You Can’t Establish Genuine Connections. While the Dalai Lama has spoken about compassion and connection often, Sean also learned by observing how the spiritual leader interacted with the people around him. As Sean points out. Since then, I have engaged in even more daily conversations about the importance, yet current lack, of human connection. Human spirituality constitutes a further emergent property of the connection between matter and the Universe, produced at the natural organizational level of species and abstract consciousness. The more difficult thing is to stay engaged. Scientific American is the essential guide to the most awe-inspiring advances in science and technology, explaining how they change our understanding of the world and shape our lives. In fact, Dr. Albert Mehrabian conducted several studies and found that only 7% of the information we take in about another person is through words. No lying. more detrimental to our health than smoking or obesity, “What’s the best thing that’s happened to you today?”, Or, “What’s the one thing you’ve always wanted to do because it could change your life, but you were too scared to start?”, Or you could use one of Vishen’s favorite questions: “What gets you out of bed in the morning?”. About 38% is through vocal elements like tone, and 55% is through nonverbal elements such as body language. No stretching or omitting or spinning the truth. That attitude of his has put him on the same stage as the Dalai Lama, President Bill Clinton, and Sir Richard Branson. Whatever it is, displaying it won’t be a problem, simply because the person you’re sharing all these weirdness with will not judge! Here, too, we find as we might expect, a reflection of the 4x3 universal fractal form in our religions, mythologies, legends, and cosmologies. In fact, praise is so powerful that people stay longer at companies and work harder when they feel appreciated for who they are at their workplace. Be honest if you’re a little bit tired. Because now, more than ever, we want to feel something more real than the too-perfect square pictures on Instagram. And doesn’t everybody want to be heard? After all, think about someone who had a massive impact on your life — did you like them because they were articulate? The human experience is a major competitive advantage. We meet strangers, we get amused by their stories, and then we leave it at that. Why […] College counseling centers across the country have seen a marked increase in students struggling with anxiety (Center for Collegiate Mental Health, 2017). Connection is an exchange of humanity. It can be hard to break the habit of talking more than we listen, but you can take a page from Marie Forleo’s book and use the I.A.P., or the Intentional Awkward Pause. There different kinds of truth. Because they smelled nice? Her acclaimed blog post, 15 Things You Should Give Up To Be Happy , was shared by over 1.3 million people on Facebook. A very weird morning routine? Allow failure to teach and give you inspiration in your life and career. There is the truth about the status of a … Connection definition is - the act of connecting : the state of being connected: such as. Praise should flow out of you. “I define connection as the energy that exists between people when they feel seen, heard, and valued; when they can give and receive without judgment; and when they derive sustenance and strength from the relationship.” ~ Brené Brown. Value your connection to the other person more than being right or important. Of enhanced, genuine connection is openness the 15 Things you Should Give up to be Happy, was by... The brain recognizes our names as part of our core identity, conversations! 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